The Trouble with Words: What Are We Really Saying?

 

Language.

It’s supposed to be our great tool for connection.

A bridge from one mind to another. A way to share what’s going on in the

chaos of our inner worlds.

 

But the more I observe it, the more I realise . . . words aren’t always the bridges

we think they are. Sometimes they’re more like broken stepping stones.

You think you’re being clear, but the other person hears something completely

different. You think you’re connecting, but there’s a disconnect in translation—

and you don’t even know it’s happening.

 

Words, after all, mean different things to different people. We hear through

filters—our past experiences, our wounds, our upbringing, our culture.

& those filters colour everything.

 

Take the word cute, for example. I once told my mum her shoes were cute. I meant it as a compliment—something warm, affectionate, loving. But she thought I was mocking her. Her filter translated cute into something childish or patronising. Same word-entirely different world of meaning.

 

It’s fascinating, isn’t it? How language, the very thing designed to connect us, can also be the thing that limits, restricts or confuses. How often do we get caught in assumptions & projections, assuming someone meant what we would’ve meant if we’d said that word?

 

And what about when our ego jumps in? When we want to hear something a certain way so we can feel justified or offended or superior or right? I’ve done it. I think most of us have. That knee-jerk reaction that has less to do with what was said & more to do with the emotional charge we attach to it.

 

It’s something I’ve been reflecting on a lot lately. I’ve even started keeping a journal where I write down one word each day to describe how I’m feeling. But even then—just one word? It’s rarely enough. Emotions, thoughts, inner sensations—they’re complex, layered & often contradictory. One word can feel like trying to describe a thunderstorm with a matchstick.

 

There are over 170,000 words in the English language & still not enough to truly express the infinite shades of the human experience. Multiply that by over 8 billion people, each with their own dictionary of meaning & you begin to see the scale of the communication puzzle.

 

So maybe the real invitation is this:

To start noticing how we use words.

To listen more curiously to how others use them.

To ask ourselves—am I really hearing what this person is trying to say or am I hearing what I expect them to say?

Am I reacting to the word itself or to what I’ve been taught it means?

 

Maybe we don’t need to be better talkers—we need to be better translators. More tolerant. More open-minded. More willing to admit that we don’t always know what someone else is trying to express. Maybe redefining words starts with understanding the people using them.

 

Because language is never just language. It’s personal. & messy. & sometimes… misheard.

 

But there’s beauty in that too.